A Better Home Life Is What Happens When Kindness Takes Over
In a world where you can be anything, be kind.
– Unknown
A few years ago, this quote became one of the most shared graphics in the online space. And I completely understand why, because one’s kindness and/or lack of kindness shapes more aspects of our lives than we think. It shapes our hearts, homes, and relationships. Now, perhaps you’re thinking, “The word kindness has become a breeding ground for compromise in recent years.” I wouldn’t entirely disagree with you, but I would challenge you to try to view it from a different lens, a gospel lens. Because when I did, my heart split. Convection set in. And the Holy Spirit spoke clearly what He was going to do about it.

Entering a New Season
It was early one morning that a looming heaviness felt far too close. I couldn’t brush it aside or dismiss it any longer. I had to take it to the Lord, knowing much would come out from unpacking it. I wrote the words in my journal, “How did I get here? What do I need to do?”
The very next line I wrote said, “Holy Spirit, I know you’re prompting me with, ‘Be kind first. Lead with kindness and love in all that I do.” Help me do this, Lord.”
I’m eternally thankful to share that, in just two days, I sensed a shift in me and in how our home functions. Peace felt present, and irritation was no longer the emotion driving the bus. It was truly the peace of God ruling in my heart and overflowing in kindness.
Seeing Kindness Shift a Home
As weeks have passed, the fruitfulness of kindness has been astounding. I’d love to know why I’m surprised. Perhaps I was downplaying what this one fruit of the Spirit could really do. As I dove into Scripture looking for kindness beyond the way Jesus lived, I found a heart in Paul’s truth-telling leadership. This is not to say that the examples of Jesus were not enough; they are more than enough. But, at times when I’m struggling, it’s most helpful to look at the men and women who were not the perfect Savior, but the ones needing a perfect Savior.

I think of one of Paul’s letters, specifically the book of the Bible we call Philippians. While this letter certainly poured out correction and direction, it also poured out such kindness, compassion, and encouragement to those he was writing to. In Philippians 4:5, it says, “Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand” (ESV). He knew that being truthful and kind mattered. He wasn’t a pushover or people pleaser, not even close. Yet he handled the truth with a kind heart toward those he was speaking to.
I fully believe that for one to be reasonable, they, too, must have kindness as a root in their spirit. Because I know when I lose my reasonableness, I first lose my kindness.

The Eternal Impact of Kindness
So, this challenge to my heart from the Spirit of God to be kind came at the least expected moment, and I want to give you that opportunity, too. Ask yourself, does the kindness of God need to rule in your heart? Do you find yourself letting irritation take the lead when it comes to setting the tone of your home? If your answer is yes, I have good news for you! Number one, you’re not alone. Number two, God wants to do a work in your heart.
Let the kindness of God, the fruit of His Spirit, rule in your heart today. Then watch and wait to see the way your kindness changes the way you lead, live, and love.
Meet Chelsey DeMatteis

Chelsey DeMatteis is a witty, tender, truth-telling woman on fire for the gospel! She is the author of three books: More of Him, Less of Me, A Thrill of Hope, and Mercy in the Margin, which releases August 4th. Chelsey is the voice behind the Living with Less Podcast and writes devotional content for Lifeway’s Journey Magazine, YouVersion, Salem Media, and Christianity.com. She lives in Central Ohio with her husband and two children.
Where to find her . . .
- Website
- Latest book: Mercy in the Margin
- Podcast
- Shop

Begin Within is a series to inspire a year-round lifestyle of gratitude that will impact not only your own life, but the lives of your neighbors as well. Gratitude is a theme we talk about often around here because it ties so closely into other missional living rhythms. Practicing gratitude reminds to keep our hearts soft and expectant and our eyes open. Therefore, the more we embrace gratitude, the easier it becomes to truly see our neighbors and where we can join what God is already doing in our neighborhoods.
If you would like to contribute to Begin Within, you can find the submission guidelines here.

