5 Life Hacks That Will Make Your Perfectionism Valuable

I’m a recovering perfectionist on a good day and one in denial the rest of the time.

A friend recently noted my “strong attention to detail,” and I laughed at her very kind way of describing perfectionism. Then continued to meticulously fold a stack of letters.

I was the student who didn’t know how to get a B and was devastated the time I accidentally broke my perfect GPA with the class I least suspected: American Lit. I didn’t give myself permission to simply do solid work. Instead, I’d fabricate ridiculous ways to ensure I was on my A-game for every single assignment:

Hyper-focus late into the night. 

Write four lines to every one on the single sheet of study notes we were allowed for a test.

Read Shakespeare plays out loud because it kept me on pace.

My overachieving mentality didn’t dissipate when I graduated. I had to top every expectation–mostly the ones I set myself–at work and at home. I’d name it during a church-wide small group study one year. The lie I’ve long believed: I must always outdo myself.

Watch it play out as I wash dishes.

My perfectionism plants its stubborn feet in sudsy water, insistent that I keep up with the yesterday version of me. Even though yesterday me was less worried, less worn, less overwhelmed. So I finish the dishes, wipe down a few unnecessary surfaces in the kitchen, and sacrifice sleep, again.

Maybe there’s a similarly pesky voice of perfectionism following you around inside your head, telling you that you should be able to get incrementally better. Every. Single. Day.

It’s relentless.

You’re worn out from all your undue try-hard. 

But also, maybe you carry a bit of shame around with your perfectionism. 

You’re told you worry too much.

Focus on the wrong things.

Care too much about your work.

Can we talk about you? How you can be a perfectionist and have peace of mind? How you don’t have to turn off your desire to do your best? How your perfectionism can be an asset, not just to you or a supervisor, but for God’s kingdom?

Life Hacks That Will Make Your Perfectionism Valuable

1. Assess the standard.

If your perfectionism pushes you to the nth degree, step back and evaluate whether the goal you set for yourself is the one that will grow you the most.

Because sometimes the harder work is taking a break.

Leaving something for tomorrow.

Delegating a task.

Trusting said delegee with the process.

Going for a solid B.

Letting go of an outcome outside your control.

Honoring Sabbath rest.

Walking into the grocery store without makeup.

Running the dishwasher twice on the same day.

Bringing something pre-packaged to a potluck.

Reading a novel.

Inviting interruptions.

Matching someone else’s pace.

Lending yourself grace.

Changing up your routine.

Laughing until you cry.

Sleeping in.

Staying up later.

Opening your front door before you clean.

What pushes you against your grain in ways that help you open up to God and the people around you? Lean into that.

2–Pick your perfect.

If your perfectionism gets in the way of welcoming neighbors into your home, try this: pick 2-3 cleaning tasks that are the highest priority. Maybe your non-negotiables are clean bathrooms and a swept floor, or countertops clear of clutter and finger-print-free glass.

Give yourself permission to diligently upkeep these areas–and grace to open the door anyway when other areas aren’t up to your personal standard. 

3–Give due glory.

Perfectionists can take themselves too seriously. It’s a byproduct of wanting to do excellent, God-honoring work–and not being able to face yourself if you do any less. If you struggle with this too, the answer is painfully simple: give God the glory He is due.

Praising God puts Him at the center of our attention. And when our focus shifts to God, we stop getting in our own way. 

Rather than tripping over our sense of rightness, we highlight Christ’s righteousness.

When we are weary of our own relentless minds, we choose to worship God. 

Instead of grumbling about something we couldn’t perfect the way we intended, we pull out a gratitude journal and begin telling God thanks.

Not only will a heart overflowing with reverence make you feel lighter, but it also offers a tangible example for others to follow.

4–Schedule unhurried time.

If you’re constantly thinking about tasks that require your attention, you might find it helpful to block time on your calendar for reading, resting, and investing in relationships. Collectively, I call this unhurried time. It’s when you can be willingly interruptible, linger in conversations in your front yard, read something for the simple enjoyment of it, or engage in something that rejuvenates you.

Putting it on your calendar tricks your mind into thinking you’re still checking a to-do or showing up for an appointment. But simultaneously, you’re making space for God to fill you and flow through you.

5–Memorize Philippians 1:6. 

Put your try-hard to good use by committing a Bible verse to memory that will anchor you in the truth of who you are and where your work stops.

Philippians 1:6 is a great one for this. In the NLT it reads,

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

I have a hunch you would welcome a challenge, so here’s that same verse in another version: The Voice (my personal favorite).

I am confident that the Creator, who has begun such a great work among you, will not stop in mid-design but will keep perfecting you until the day Jesus the Anointed, our Liberating King, returns to redeem the world.

You are in progress and precious to God.

God isn’t finished, so you can rest before all the work in front of you is finished.

Pressure’s off to be perfect. Instead, surrender to the gentle but persistent work God is doing on the inside of you to make you look more like Him.

A Prayer for Perfectionists

I’ll leave you with a prayer for the days you’re overly sensitive about your work.

Lord, help me to listen for Your voice throughout the day. Show me where to work harder and where to ease up on myself. Help me to accept Your grace when I don’t see myself as good enough. Give me vision to see how worthy You are of worship. Overflow through me as I make space for relationships to grow. 

In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.

Just a friend over here in your corner,

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What if you gave your faith the chance to ripple right into your neighborhood? These quick tips provide a wide variety of baby steps to help you begin to build friendships with your neighbors. When we get close to God and let others get close to us, the things God is working out in us can show.

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