How to Face Risk When You Want to Run Away

When you’ve answered most of the prompts in Jennifer Dukes Lee’s guided journal, Stuff I’d Only Tell God, you’re left with the ones you’ve been avoiding. But I wasn’t raised to stop before the end, so I pick the pen back up, sit with more questions, write words that make me feel exposed.

There’s a risk I’ve feared but not dug into the why. God wants to talk about it. Show me where my assumptions are flawed and reactionary.

Maybe you’ve been here too. Fearing the no because you don’t want to be misunderstood or rejected again. Fearing the yes because you’d assume it was sympathy or special consideration, and you want neither. You’d rather erase both possibilities, not risk hoping or caring.

Avoidance has an allure, doesn’t it? Seems like the safer option. Could be true—for a while. But there’s a sneaky way that risk comes back around even when we run the opposite way.

Take Jonah. A man with a calling he doesn’t want. A message for people he’d rather see punished. For good reason, of course. The Ninevites were notorious for a slew of things that crushed God’s heart. Yet God wanted Jonah to embrace the same aching, unwarranted love He felt for Ninevah.

Jonah runs away. Tries to wiggle away from God’s gaze and His direct request: tell them to turn around and see Me.

Jonah, we might say. Just because you can’t see God right now, doesn’t mean He can’t see you. But deep down we get it. It’s peek-a-boo, only we’re not the toddler with wide-eyed anticipation, and it isn’t a game anymore.

When life gets awkward, uncomfortable, uncertain, we want to close our eyes and make it go away. Staying busy helps, so we take on more instead of facing the wound God wants to heal. Name it safe things like “recovering people pleaser.”

Maybe people-pleasing wasn’t part of the equation for Jonah, but I see myself in his compulsion to hide. Ignore. Withdraw. Self-doubt. Trust myself before God.

I’m guilty of choosing what rocks the boat least. Denying I have a preference. Insisting I’ve got it covered. Smiling to cover up that I’m overwhelmed. Shying away from anything that feels confrontational. I’d rather be comfortable and keep everyone happy—at the same time, please.

This Is Who We Are

But God is too kind to let us indulge in hurt and comparison, self-pity and defeat. He pursues us even when we plug our ears, hide, or run away. He didn’t give up on Jonah. Gave him an unlikely (and smelly!) way out of the mess he’d created. And He’ll never give up on you.

God is too kind to let us indulge in hurt and comparison, self-pity and defeat (Twyla Franz quote).

Psalm 145:8-9 reminds us that

The LORD is gracious and full of compassion, Slow to anger and great in mercy. The LORD is good to all, And His tender mercies are over all His works.
ESV

That’s the sort of God who met Jonah in deep water that would have swallowed him. Provided a giant fish, then shade from a tree. He’s a God of second chances, who rewrites stories and hearts so He can enfold more in His tender embrace.

He’ll face us square in front of the mirror and stand beside us as He reminds us who we are.

Not people pleasers but those who “aim to learn what pleases our Lord” (Ephesians 5:10, The Voice).

Not naysayers but those who tuck truth into their hearts and whisper it in the night.

Not self-pitiers but those who look up and out so they can see beyond themselves.

Not conflict avoiders but those who stay in the fray and battle for those they love.

Not risk dismissers, but those who come boldly into His presence (reference) so He can heal and fill us until we brim over.

The Risk in Avoiding Risk

God’s got a much better plan than you feeling stuck. Knows you well enough to tell when there’s more beneath that you don’t want to talk about yet. Maybe He’s been pressing on something in your life too.

God' got a much better plan than you feeling stuck (Twyla Franz quote).

It’s because He loves you. Remember that as you get honest with Him. Name what is, then go deeper. He knows all of it already. But He can’t uproot and make right unless we own it, then surrender it.

Find somewhere you won’t be distracted. This is important work. Not easy but necessary.

Because the things you’ve avoided, the fears you haven’t named, the risks you haven’t taken—they affect your relationship with God and also how you interact with the people around you. Make a practice of closing off and masking and you nurture distance between you and everyone else. That’s the risk in avoiding risk.

God calls us to be light bearers, hope sharers, grace extenders. He is light–the Father of lights, according to James 1:14–and we represent Him, emanate His light so long as we’re not hiding from it.

Let’s pray.

Jesus, thank you for pursuing me and never giving up on me. For welcoming my honesty and holding me tight as I practice. For illuminating the things that get in between us. Give me the courage to stay close, where Your light is brightest.

Just a friend over here in your corner,

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