How to Re-Find the Center when Your Life is Out of Line

Sometimes the things in our life get a bit unruly, pushing their demands, steamrolling our good intentions. You can feel a bit helpless when your life is out of line, everything upside down. Even the Apostle Paul can relate, as he explains in Romans 7:18:

The longings to do what is right are within me, but willpower is not enough to accomplish it.

TPT

It’s the push-pull of good intentions and good intentions never being enough.

It’s the battle we feel like we’re always fighting—the one in our minds.

It’s the story of desire versus regret, rising above and falling hard, being too controlling yet still out of control.

It’s what bubbles beneath the mask we wear that says everything is alright.

It’s the language between the lines when we say, “I’m good!”

It’s the die-hard self we’re trying to die to everyday.

It’s the discouragement that hits hard when we feel inept ourselves in what we want to lead others towards.

We might describe it as being off-center, off-kilter, less-than-our-best. But regardless of what we call it, we don’t want to stay here long.

3 ways to re-find the Center when we are off-kilter

If you’ve been feeling off, here are three things you can do. Each are an open invite to realness with God, yourself, and those around you that is at the heart of missional living.

1—Check your motivation

When we find ourselves off-center, it’s time for a pause. What drives you to do the things you do? Follow the line of your motivation and it will always lead you to the root of what matters to you.

As a writer, there is a tension I walk of producing and sharing content yet doing it serve others and point all glory to Him. This verse shows me the path I want to take:

Don’t allow self-promotion to hide in your hearts, but in authentic humility put others first and view others as more important than yourselves. Abandon every display of selfishness. Possess a greater concern for what matters to others instead of your own interests.And consider the example that Jesus, the Anointed One, has set before us. Let his mindset become your motivation.

Philippians 2:3b-5 TPT

That last line I first read then curved into cursive letters in my journal. Let his mindset become your motivation.

His mindset. This I pause again to ponder.

The verses that follow talk of humility and intentional vulnerability, of selflessness, and obedience.

That’s what I want to look like too—in every area of my life.

Yet I can’t think like Him if I am not willing to learn how He thinks.

I can’t learn to imitate Him if I don’t spend time in the next-to-Him place.

And I can’t model a life worth imitating for my family, neighbors, and friends if I’m not willing to embrace the cultivating that gets down into the uncomfortable places.

And neither, sweet friend, can you.

2—Stop trying

The more stuck we feel the harder we might try to wriggle free. To stop trying feels counter-productive. Yet sometimes the stopping is what we actually need to be doing.

If you’ve been pushing yourself hard and getting nowhere, maybe it’s time to slow down instead. Find a quiet place and practice quieting your heart in God’s presence.

It’s easier to hear the way He whispers when we go slow, and His whispers always lead us back to Him.

No matter how many things we can check on the “good neighbor” list—

No matter how many things we’ve gotten right—

No matter what we do for Him—

Everything will feel out of balance if He is not at the center, and everything will find its place when He is at the center of our lives.

Maybe today you need to do less doing and spend some time simply being with the One who recenters us because He is the Center.

Instead of living for God, let’s live with Him.

3—Affirm who you are in God’s eyes (and repeat)

This I’ve found true through and through: who God says I am heals and makes whole.

But knowing who I am and truly living like I believe it down to my very bones can be miles apart. And if I don’t see rightly who I really am, I flounder.

Perhaps you can relate.

You want to live a life of authenticity that points other people to Jesus. But you feel lost yourself.

You see your own lack in clearer focus than His fullness.

You’ve not been kind to yourself, and you’ve thought it doesn’t matter, but you’re seeing now that it does.

Deep down you’ve stopped believing that God loves you because He is love, not because of anything you do. So you’ve tried all the things in an attempt to earn that closeness with Him. And you’ve held your failings over your own head.

It’s time for a change.

It’s time to soak in the truth of who you really are in God’s eyes that will give you ground to stand on as you live and love and lead missionally.

If your self-talk has gotten out of line, if the words you are believing about yourself don’t line up with what you read in Scripture, try picking a few verses that affirm who you are in God’s eyes. Put them up somewhere you will be them often or spend a few minutes a day committing them to memory.

Here are a few of my favorites you could consider:

You are always and dearly loved by God!

Colossians 3:12a TPT

 But we are a colony of heaven on earth as we cling tightly to our life-giver, the Lord Jesus Christ . . .

Philippians 3:20a TPT

We are those who boast in what Jesus Christ has done, and not in what we can accomplish in our own strength.

Philippians 3:3b TPT

Friend, what He says is true of you doesn’t change because God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. So practice believing it today, and let your pressing into Him ripple out beyond you.

A prayer for the one whose life feels out of line

I feel off today, Lord, so I come to you, the only One who can put all the things back into their proper order. Teach me to keep the first things first. Show me what I need to let go. I invite Your deep, cultivating work in the places I’ve guarded access. Come be the center of my life again. In Your precious and holy name, Jesus, I pray. Amen.

Change your actual life in less than 5 minutes per day!

You can change your actual life in less than 5 minutes a day because baby steps truly can change the trajectory of your life. If you want 2021 to be the year you actually start living on mission in your neighborhood, this little book (available as a paperback and on Kindle) will help you get there. Each of the 30-day devotions takes but a few minutes to read, but they will lead to lasting life change.

Coming Up!

Join us for the third annual Uncommon Normal gratitude challenge this November.

In case you missed it!