For many years, all I could see were the things my wife didn’t do, the expectations she didn’t meet, the person she wasn’t–instead of seeing the person God had created her to be.

I was very ungrateful–both to my wife, and for my wife. Ungrateful to God for this very mismatched woman he had brought me. Of course I didn’t know it at the time. I just thought, “LORD, what in the world were you thinking? I’m pretty sure this is not the person you meant for me.” 

Gratitude helps me to reframe the things I hate. For instance, the dishes are a task that I don’t find any joy in. However, I find much to be grateful for in the dishes. The proof of meals cooked and savored. Hot, running water and lavender dish soap that aid the process. That feeling of relief when I can drain the sink at the end, and lotion to soothe my dried out hands. Constantly complaining about it would make me more miserable. Gratitude helps me reframe its value.

I didn’t expect to be hit with anxiety and depression the way that I was after welcoming my second baby into the world. I knew many women experienced the “baby blues” but this felt different. Each day, I felt myself sinking further and further into a pit of hopelessness and paralyzing anxiety.