Gratitude: A Bridge to Healing Postpartum Depression and Anxiety
I pulled the covers over my head as I tried to breathe through the waves of anxiety that crashed over me. Another day. New decisions. Making even the smallest choices such as what to wear or eat for breakfast felt impossible. Anxiety waited for me at every corner. It lurked under the surface of every step forward and made its move when any form of confidence tried to take over.
Postpartum depression and anxiety
I was in denial that I needed help. I was in denial that anything could help. Each day hopelessness spread like wildfire in my heart. Each day proved to be more difficult than the last. How could I break the cycle? How could I be free? Where was God when I needed Him most?
I didn’t expect to be hit with anxiety and depression the way that I was after welcoming my second baby into the world. I knew many women experienced the “baby blues” but this felt different. Each day, I felt myself sinking further and further into a pit of hopelessness and paralyzing anxiety.
My husband could see the person he knew slipping away and urged me to seek help. Taking the step to seek help from a professional was not one I wanted to take, but I knew I could not continue down the path I was traveling. I was able to connect to a local therapist who specialized in postpartum anxiety and depression.
A bridge to healing
During my first session, understanding, warmth, and remarkable wisdom emanated from the therapist I spoke with. Each session provided the tools I needed to not just escape my current reality but to stop the destructive cycle I was in, in its tracks. Though my therapist gave me the tools I needed, it was I who needed to put them into practice. As our sessions progressed, I realized that the most powerful tool she gave me was gratitude.
During the initial healing process, I pushed God away, believing the lie that He had abandoned me in a season I needed Him most. I had also allowed other lies to take root. I had started to forget His goodness and faithfulness. It was not until I decided enough was enough and began to seek God again that I started to believe that I could heal.
I remember glancing through my notes from a recent therapy session when the word “gratitude” stood out in several places. From that day forward I began to practice gratitude. The process was slow in the beginning, but I began to see the beauty of life once again. And most importantly, I saw God’s faithfulness in action as I thanked him for the good in my life.
Practicing gratitude can extinguish the deep roots of anxiety. Gratitude tells both the heart and the mind that there is reason to take the next step forward. Gratitude takes the focus off of the negative and pushes us to focus on the positive, no matter how small. As practicing gratitude becomes a habit, new pathways are formed within the brain. When gratitude is regularly practiced it is as if the brain searches for reasons to be thankful even in the midst of bleak circumstances. Anxiety and depression can no longer dominate existence.
The more I intentionally practice gratitude, the better I can navigate bleak circumstances. Ultimately, it was choosing gratitude that pulled me out of a deep pit of anxiety and depression. Choosing gratitude helped me to reconnect with God, who always had His loving arms waiting for me.
Do you, too, have the “baby blues”?
If you find yourself in a season marked with anxiety or depression, please, first seek help. Someone who can come alongside you and subjectively help you through the muck and mire is an invaluable bridge to healing. Secondly, practice gratitude. It may not “feel” right at first. It may be uncomfortable or feel impossible, but start small. Gratitude isn’t a feeling, it’s a choice. Choosing to be grateful, especially during a difficult time, will produce fruit of joy which will overflow to every area of life.
Look to examples in the Bible. The Psalms are full of David’s songs of gratitude even when faced with impossible circumstances. Does he have moment of despair? Absolutely, he’s human. But his examples of steadfast gratitude show us that habitual gratitude grows our faith and increases our dependence on the Lord.
When faced with moments, days, or seasons filled with anxiety or depression make the choice to practice gratitude. For “a cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones” (Proverbs 17:22).
Meet Allie Ososkie
Allie Ososkie is a teacher turned homeschool mom and writer. Through her writing, Allie seeks to bring hope and encouragement to fellow mamas as she navigates the ups and downs of motherhood. Allie currently resides in Northern Virginia with her husband and two kids. Allie love to read, enjoy nature with her family, and serve with her local mom friends in her church’s mom’s group, The Nest.
Where to find her . . .
Begin Within is a series to inspire a year-round lifestyle of gratitude that will impact not only your own life, but the lives of your neighbors as well. Gratitude is a theme we talk about often around here because it ties so closely into other missional living rhythms. Practicing gratitude reminds to keep our hearts soft and expectant and our eyes open. Therefore, the more we embrace gratitude, the easier it becomes to truly see our neighbors and where we can join what God is already doing in our neighborhoods.
If you would like to contribute to Begin Within, you can find the submission guidelines here.
Creating Ripples
If you would like to cultivate rhythms in addition to gratitude that will empower you live on mission in your neighborhood, check out Cultivating a Missional Life: A 30-Day Devotional to Gently Help You Open Your Heart, Home, and Life to Your Neighbors. This small book will help you make a big impact in your neighborhood as you learn to let missional living flow from the inside out. Get the 30-day missional living challenge free when you purchase the book.
