Why Painful Seasons Make for Tender Growth (For Enneagram 7s)
Dear Enthusiast,
If ever you’ve wished for a fast forward button through the painful seasons of your life, this is for you.
You’re full of spontaneous energy and fun ideas. You help the rest of us lighten up and enjoy the adventure of life. You’re bold and bright and brilliant. We’re grateful for your contagious optimism, your eager yeses, your enthusiastic encouragement.
Because of you, we try new things that we’d be afraid of otherwise. We also dream bigger dreams, thanks to you. You connect many a person because you have a special way of making everyone feel welcome. Thank you for the endless ways you enrich our lives!
But friend to friend, can we talk about the anxiety that unsettles you in the quiet moments? The exhaustion that takes over when you slow down? The pressure you feel to always stay positive?
Maybe it’s been especially hard to sleep at night.
Maybe you have an unspoken fear that you could be underwhelming.
Maybe you’ve been misunderstood—criticized even.
If that’s you, would you pull up a chair and stay awhile?
A Life-Changing Secret to Spiritual Growth
There are things you’d rather stuff down and keep out of sight. Painful seasons you’d rather side-step. Complicated situations you can’t get away from fast enough.
But you have a tender strength, friend! I’ve witnessed the ways you bravely put down roots when you’d rather run away. You inspire me deeply when you push against your grain and seek God in the midst of your pain.
I’d erase it if I could–your physical pain, the devastating grief, the discouraging rejections–but I’d never wish away the way you’re learning to trust Jesus when life feels unfair.
You’re discovering a life-changing secret to spiritual growth: staying put.
Holding on when you want to let go.
Clinging to Jesus before it makes sense.
Choosing gratitude when the trial is toughest.
Slowing down to authentically connect.
Sifting through the lies with Jesus.
It would be far easier to avoid the heavy and hard. But you’re doing the brave thing by staying put, seeking God in your most painful seasons, and embracing the fruit it yields.
Painful Seasons Make for Tender Growth
Painful seasons have a way of tenderizing the soul, as if we step barefoot into what the Celtics call a “thin space.” The distance between heaven and earth, in these moments, feels paper thin. The holy and sacred seep into the everyday. Our knees grow weak.
We become more attentive to God, and our need for Him.
Somehow the pain pales in comparison to the glory we behold as we come closer to a holy God. We’re overwhelmed. Undone.
Stay in His presence, and the closed-off and calloused places in your heart will begin to melt. Inch by inch, you’ll give God access.
Where God is welcome, He moves in, righting, rearranging, reviving. He’s kind and patient.
He’ll invite you deeper with tender questions, and offer His hand to squeeze. Stay longer and you’ll learn more layers of His love for you.
Your heart can rest here.
You are held.
You are His.
And you’re right where you need to be to not miss the tender growth that sprouts from painful seasons: next to Him.
We learn to copy Christ (1 Cor. 11:1) when we stay close. We adopt the thought patterns we overhear and replicate the habits we witness.
If you want to cultivate the fruit of the Spirit in your life, keep in close proximity to Christ.
God Is Near, and He Won’t Let You Go
Come close enough to be awed by the majesty of Jesus, especially when all feels tender. This promise is for you:
The eye of the Eternal is upon those who live in awe of Him,
those who hope in His steadfast love.
When you feel stuck, turn to Him.
When you feel bored, turn to Him.
When you feel anxious, turn to Him.
When you feel like running, run to Him.
And when your faith feels shaken, praise Him.
Did you know that giving God glory grows our faith? What a wildly beautiful truth to tuck into our hearts! It says here in Romans 5:20-21, “In fact, his faith grew as he gave glory to God because he was supremely confident that God could deliver on His promise” (The Voice).
Gratitude directs our attention towards God. We name what we know is true of Him, thank Him before He comes through because we know His nature. And it changes something deep within us.
Our hearts become tender and our hands open. Our vision clears. We know God is near.
So in the moments you feel most distracted or numbed by your pain, lean into gratitude. Praise God especially then.
Let your worship stir awe and wonder.
And no matter if or when the pain lets go, know this: God won’t let you go.
May I pray for you?
Jesus, I lift my friend up to You right now. You know what she needs. You hear her prayers. You never ever stop caring. Give her the strength to stay when it hurts, to seek You in the hard, to praise You before it gets better.
Would You hold her tight and remind her that she never has to face the pain alone. You will always be right here.
In Your name I pray, Jesus. Amen.
Gift for You
Before you go, there’s a gift I’d love to tuck into your hands. It’s four beautiful lists for Enneagram 7s, highlighting
- clues you might be an Enneagram 67
- how you can use your strengths to mirror God’s grace to your neighbors
- and (for the rest of us) how we can best missionally love the Enneagram 7s we know
You can grab the Enneagram Neighboring Lists. below. Each list is available both as phone wallpaper and as a printable pdf.
Bonus: you also get the four lists for each of the other Enneagram numbers!
I’ll leave you with one of the tips for neighboring well as an Enneagram 7: Choose to be present, no matter what’s coming next.
Just a friend over here in your corner,
