"That was the beginning of an eight-year downward spiral that ultimately would send my mother into the arms of Jesus" (Rebecca Yauger form Begin Within: A Gratitude Series).

“Your Mother’s had a stroke.”

I pressed the phone closer to my ear to make sure I heard Mom’s best friend correctly. My healthy, vibrant, always-on-the-go Mom had a stroke? No. It couldn’t be true.

But it was true. That was the beginning of an eight-year downward spiral that ultimately would send my mother into the arms of Jesus.

While it would be easy to focus on the strokes, and soon after, the dementia, and the heartache of watching your parent’s life ebb away, I’d rather focus on the small moments, the victories, and most importantly, what my mother taught me during those last eight years.

Lessons From My Mom

My mother was in a rehabilitation hospital after that first stroke. I watched her during her physical and occupational therapy sessions. The therapists would want her to walk. Mom would ask “How far?” Or they’d want her to do arm raises to strengthen her weakened arm. Mom would ask, “How many?” Mom had a determination to meet each and every goal the therapists set for her. She faced it all with courage and a strength that awed me.

But that stroke was the first of four. The second to the last one took her voice (part of me still wants to have a major conversation with God about that one!). Mom’s words would be garbled for the rest of her life. Her memory was fading with dementia as well.

Even then, she continued to teach me so many life lessons that are a part of me today.

With her words mangled from the effects of stroke #3, communication was a challenge. She’d ask me a question, and because her words were so muddled, I couldn’t understand what she was saying.

“Sorry, Mom,” I’d tell her. “I don’t have my universal translator turned on.” And thankfully, she’d laugh. That’s the one thing the strokes didn’t take, her laughter.

Rebecca Yauger for Begin Within Gratitude Series: "That’s the one thing the strokes didn’t take, her laughter."

We’d play a round of charades, and guessing games, and eventually, I’d understand what she was trying to say, answer her question, and go back to what I was doing.

Less than five minutes later, the question came again. This time, I understood it. No charades required. Alas, she didn’t remember that she had just asked me the same question a few minutes earlier.

I patiently answered her, understanding that it wasn’t her fault. I refused to get frustrated with the repeated questions due to the effects of dementia.

During those days, we were able to laugh often. She may have been frustrated when I didn’t understand what she was trying to say, but she was just as patient with me while I honed my skills at charades, as I was with answering repeated questions.

Don’t get me wrong. Those days were long and difficult. But I do my best to focus on the sweet moments, when we could laugh, and when her speech was a little clearer, even if we had the same conversation again five minutes later.

I find myself thankful for those small, precious moments. It was during that time that Mom taught me to stay in the present, and to stay connected with her. Worries about the future, especially about her health, would dissipate. Memories of the past were absent for her, and me wishing to have my old Mom back pre-strokes and pre-dementia were pointless. So, I focused on the now, and our time together.

"It was during that time that Mom taught me to stay in the present, and to stay connected with her": Rebecca Yauger for Begin Within Gratitude Series

Time when the rest of the world melted away and it was Mom and I together, talking and laughing.

To me, those little moments were God’s way of showing up and reminding me that He was still there in our midst, no matter what was happening.

Matthew 6:34 says, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (New International Version). Those long days with Mom were lived out in this Scripture.

I’m thankful for small moments, for God’s continuing presence, and for God to allow me the privilege of being a witness to my mother’s never-ending courage and positive attitude, no matter what she was facing. May I be that brave and strong in my own life, standing on God’s firm foundation.

Meet Rebecca Yauger

Meet Begin Within: A Gratitude Series feature writer, Rebecca Yauger, a published writer, blogger, three-time cancer survivor, and current Web Manager for American Christian Fiction Writers.

Rebecca Yauger is a writer and blogger. She’s a three-time contributor to various Chicken Soup for the Soul books, and has been published in Guideposts Magazine, ChristianParenting.org and Faith Around The Corner. She’s the current Web Manager for American Christian Fiction Writers. She’s a three-time cancer survivor as well. Becky grew up in a military family, and now after living all over the world, she makes her home near Dallas. She is married to her high school sweetheart and is a proud mother and grandmother.

Where to find her . . .

Begin Within is a series to inspire a year-round lifestyle of gratitude that will impact not only your own life, but the lives of your neighbors as well. Gratitude is a theme we talk about often around here because it ties so closely into other missional living rhythms. Practicing gratitude reminds to keep our hearts soft and expectant and our eyes open. Therefore, the more we embrace gratitude, the easier it becomes to truly see our neighbors and where we can join what God is already doing in our neighborhoods.

If you would like to contribute to Begin Within, you can find the submission guidelines here.