It’s just been a hard two weeks, I said to my husband for the 1,352 week in a row.

He looked at me wearily and I thought again that I was jealous of how great grey hair looked on this man. Not the same for me and I will color my hair from now until the good Lord takes me home.

At this moment, we were surrounded by water. And not the good kind on a beach lapping gently at our on vacation toes. And actually not really much water anymore, the water had come and gone and in its wake left destruction.

And mud. So. Much. Mud.

One fine afternoon when I wasn’t even home there had been a sudden downpour. And it somehow found its way into our basement and took no prisoners. By the time the water was pumped out there wasn’t a corner left unaffected.

I arrived home from my girl’s weekend to what the family was calling “The Day After.”

Todd and I walked back upstairs and out onto the deck where a few hundred of my books were laying out to dry, our giant rug was spread across the trampoline, and my son’s sweaters were inexplicably drying in the branches of a tree. Oh mercy.

And now we had the arduous task of figuring out what to do next. What to do next apparently included a bazillion stops, a giant ongoing fight with the insurance, so many out of pocket expenses that would take every penny of our savings and so many emotions.

It was one of so many life THINGS that happen to people. The unexpected things we don’t see coming that upturn our worlds. I had my requisite breakdown the night before when I was still out of town with my girlfriends. But now I realized I somehow found myself thinking about how cute my husband was right in the middle of the disaster.

Because I have learned a thing or two about gratitude. And now my brain serves it up to me without me really even realizing it. And practicing gratitude leads to a little thing called joy which I am a huge fan of. Not happiness all by itself, that is fleeting and depending on circumstances, but true joy. For the record I did not feel happy about this disaster.

How to Find Gratitude in the Disaster

But friends, the joy was right there in the disaster with me, because there was so darn much to be grateful for.

This may sound ridiculous when you are surrounded by no less than 200 ruined books and so many dollars of ruined other things (books just feel like the most important to mention, but my son would like you to know he lost all of his computer stuff and gaming items—RIP drive simulator!) but I looked around and I found it.

I was so grateful. For what had been spared and most of all for the love.

Because throughout this time that could have taken me down, there were so many people loving me well, not only the aforementioned cute husband.

FIRST, when the moment happened the people I gave birth to sprang into action. They might not be able to clean a kitchen but they can sure as heck deal with water streaming into the basement. I found out my kids can WORK.

They had heaved the books up the stairs. And that rug which would need to be thrown out but in their hope they had spread on the trampoline to dry. They had bailed out buckets, saved cats, helped set up pumps, and driven to the store a million times before I even walked back in the door.

They collectively hugged me when I walked in the door and told me to sit.

Then my extended family jumped in, bringing food and drinks and support and a giant cookie cake with “I’m Sorry Your Basement Flooded” printed on it.

And then they got to work, pulling out flooring so we could reuse it, taking wet things home to dry them, and hugging me every time I cried, which was many times.

The basement guys and the restoration people and the neighbors, all the people who came over to help and offer whatever we might need—the gratitude I felt for each and every one of them made me weep.

Exercising Your Gratitude Muscle

That gratitude lives in my soul all of my days. Do I forget it sometimes and get cranky about the weather and how my socks are bunchy and wish I could go on more vacations and that people would be better drivers?

All the yeses. Because I, like you, am a human person. I forget to be grateful. I get caught up in what isn’t.

But that shift to gratitude makes all the difference. In the big messes and in the little ones.

Practicing gratitude in the small things means your gratitude muscle is ready for the big things.

Today, at this moment, what can you be grateful for? That cup of coffee always tops my list (made by my sweet gray-haired husband), the sweet middle schoolers who stop in to see me, a job I love, the blue sky, a hug from my teenager . . . I could go on and on and I’m guessing so could you.

Gratitude begins in the daily, and when the chips are down? Gratitude will meet you and carry you through the big things. And it will even leave joy in its wake.

Meet Amy Betters-Midtvedt

Amy Betters-Midtvedt is the author of You’ll Make It (and They Will Too): Everything No One Talks About When Parenting Teens, with an online community of over a million readers and twenty-five years of experience working with adolescents and families, in both her job as a literacy coach and in her personal life—where she and husband Todd wrangle their five children. Amy has a master’s degree in leadership, curriculum, and instruction and began her writing journey when she launched her website and social media in 2016. Her work has appeared in many publications online, including Huffington Post, Parents Magazine, and Your Teen Magazine, as well as in So God Made a Mother and So God Made a Grandma by Leslie Means. You can find her on Facebook, Instagram, and—much to her teenagers’ delight—Tik Tok.

Where to find her . . .

• Website
• Book: You’ll Make It (and They Will Too): Everything No One Talks About When Parenting Teens
• Shop
• Facebook
• Instagram
• Tik Tok

Begin Within is a series to inspire a year-round lifestyle of gratitude that will impact not only your own life, but the lives of your neighbors as well. Gratitude is a theme we talk about often around here because it ties so closely into other missional living rhythms. Practicing gratitude reminds to keep our hearts soft and expectant and our eyes open. Therefore, the more we embrace gratitude, the easier it becomes to truly see our neighbors and where we can join what God is already doing in our neighborhoods.

If you would like to contribute to Begin Within, you can find the submission guidelines here.