From Friendship-Building to Organic Discipleship

Do you want your life to matter? Do you want to see hope restored in the hearts of your neighbors? We are all feeling it—the weight of the unknown, the wear of long-waiting, the desire for everything to just be normal again. When we are feeling low, it’s prime time for the glimpses upwards, for the visible evidence of God being near and at work in our lives. We long to share the hope within us with our neighbors, but we don’t know where to begin. How do we actually move from friendship-building to organic discipleship?

We talk about it often around here, organic discipleship, so this week we are going to unpack it a bit more. We’ll put practical steps to theory and leave with an actionable step you can begin to practice today. Let’s begin with the two key components of organic discipleship.

1. Proximity to Jesus

This is where we begin—being so wrapped up in the nearness of Christ it effects the way we see, the way we speak, the way we value those around us, and the way we position our priorities. The nearer we come, the more Jesus rubs off on us, and the more everything that is not holy melts away. Before we can disciple others, we must come to Jesus tender, moldable, open. We let Him first disciple us, smooth our rough-hewn edges into something beautiful.

There is nothing about our lives too rough to be sanded by Him. The past griefs and grievances, the stained memories, the re-do’s we wish we could have—none of these are beyond being covered in grace. But drawing close to Christ means we must surrender them, let Him take the burden.

Being close to Jesus changes everything. We learn the rhythms of His heart, the way He sees us, loves us, all of us.

Before we can share hope, it must live inside us.

So we come near and often to Him. As Psalm 5:3 beckons us,

At each and every sunrise you will hear my voice
as I prepare my sacrifice of prayer to you.
Every morning I lay out the pieces of my life on the altar
and wait for your fire to fall upon my heart.

Establishing a routine of coming to Jesus first, before the rest of our day steals our focus, makes it so much easier to remember how near He is through the rest of the hours. If you would like some tips on establishing a morning routine, I wrote about my personal routine and how to practically start your own here.

2. Access to our lives

Proximity to Jesus is part of the equation that results in organic discipleship, but another integral component is that we allow others access to our lives. We drop the facades, the hustle to earn, the right to be always right, and we move towards authenticity—with ourselves, with God, and with others. When we taste glimpses of being near Him it fuels our desire to come ever closer, no matter what we need to leave behind. The things that cloud His brightness shining through us diminish the closer we come. Yet to share this brightness unfiltered with those around us, we have to let ourselves be truly known. We have to invite people in close.

Offering others access to our lives gives opportunity for our everyday lives to be observed. How do we talk to our kids when we are hangry? How do we root ourselves in faith when the things to fear are loud and many? How do we respond to conflict? How do we prioritize spending time with Jesus when our schedules are full? How do we walk in humility and grace and kindness? How do we notice and value all people? How to we apologize when we mess up? How do we withhold judgement but readily extend forgiveness? How do we live lives of integrity and honor? How do we balance our priorities? How do we define our worth?

In Building a Discipling Culture, Mike Breen unpacks how gifting others proximity to our lives puts into play an invitation to truly know us and an invitation—a call up—to copy us as we copy Christ. Here is how Breen explains it:

Invitation is about being invited into a relationship where you have access to a person’s life and all the vibrancy, safety, love and encouragement that reside there. To learn from the places you clearly see Jesus at work in people’s lives, which you can see only by having access to them. But by accepting that invitation, you also accept the challenge that comes with it: The challenge to live into your identity as a son or daughter of the King.

Modeling a life immersed in Christ that is visible to those around us is one way to define organic discipleship. Let’s unpack some more of how we practically put this second piece—visibility—into practice, however.

Love in action

Organic discipleship is not confined to spoken words. To disciple is to demonstrate our love in action, to lead by serving, to generously give kindness everywhere we go. It’s ardently giving God the glory for all things, always—not serving others so we look better ourselves. It’s loving well as an overflow of knowing how infinitely loved we are.

Offer a cup of cold water to a neighbor kid while they are playing in your front yard, help a neighbor tear down a fence or carry something heavy, or lean into an interruption for a few minutes to grace another with your attention and listening, and Jesus says that we are actually doing it for Him.

So much of organic discipleship is simply living your ordinary, everyday life, but not keeping it hidden, tucked away out of sight.

It’s going out to visible places like your front yard, front porch, and driveway, and inviting others in to the places that are not visible from across the street.

It’s dropping your guard and bravely choosing authenticity.

It’s also recognizing that baby steps are often what get us here—that it’s about movement in a certain direction, not where we are starting from or what point we are on our journey.

It’s giving ourselves grace to try and not get it right.

It’s apologizing quickly and often.

It’s about showing up and letting ourselves be seen even though we are still works-in-progress, still learning how to let God shine through our every action.

Words drenched in humility

While we don’t want to push our words ahead of actually getting to know our neighbors, there is a time and place to use words to disciple organically. Listen for them with Holy Spirit sensitivity. There is no exact formula because every person has a different story, different wounds, different past experience with God. God sees through to each of our hearts and He knows the words we need to hear.

Choosing an attitude of humility will allow you to more clearly hear when God speaks to you and through you. Drenching your words in humility will also keep them grounded in love.

Organic discipleship is giving an answer for the hope inside us when we are asked, as we encouraged in 1 Peter 3:15-16a:

But give reverent honor in your hearts to the Anointed One and treat him as the holy Master of your lives. And if anyone asks about the hope living within you, always be ready to explain your faith with gentleness and respect.

It is sharing our words, imperfectly at times, but always while holding our neighbors in high regards.

It is telling of our own inadequacies and imperfections.

It is choosing vulnerability as we model for others how we are letting God transform us in all areas of our lives.

And it is readily apologizing when our words fail to reflect the One we represent.

If organic discipleship feels just too hard, remember that we start small. We take one baby step, then another, and another. I’ll leave you with a baby step idea that you can try today:

To practice proximity with God and those in your neighborhood, the key components of organic discipleship, spend a few minutes somewhere quiet. Ask God to reveal an area He wants to work on in your life. Write it down. Then practice that thing somewhere you are visible to your neighbors.

Here is how it might work:

I spend a few minutes opening my heart to God, inviting Him to see through me and bring to attention an area of my life that is not aligned with His heart. Perhaps I write down the word patience. I notice I can be too focused on work and short on patience with my kids. I now spend some time playing out in the front yard. I ask for God’s grace to model patience and presence with my kids. When I mess up, I apologize on the spot, no matter who might be within ear shot.

And now it’s your turn!

I would so much love to hear about your baby step. To share, you may leave a comment on the blog or connect with me on Instagram or Facebook.

I’d also love to pray a blessing over you as we close.

Jesus, I thank you for my friends. I thank you for the desire you are stirring in their hearts to be intentional about being proximate to You and inviting neighbors into closer proximity with them. Would you bless and multiply their baby steps? Please lead them every step of their journey into missional living and organic discipleship with their neighbors. In Your holy and precious name, I pray, Lord, amen.

Just a friend over here in your corner,

Change your actual life in less than 5 minutes per day!

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